Random thoughtss.....on Leadership

Apologies for the lack of posts... my asdl was down, that bloomin storm messed it up

hmm so Random thoughts on Leadership(Im not gonna elaborate on that for those of you who don't know what it is). Leadership began again, new 'facilitator', new faces yet I've come to realise in the year that I bin around that the more things change, the more they stay the same.

Almost can't believe it's bin a year since I tottered in with a cloak,heels,eyeshadow and a HANDBAG!! I'm proud to report alots changed since then, I walked out at the end of the year with an oversized 'believer' t-shirt and the dirtiest old pumps you have ever seen. If someone had to make me complete the sentence... "I went to leadership and....' I'd have to end it with .... met the maddest, strangest people EVER! Don't think such nuts exist anywhere else and even so I highly doubt they have a monthly meeting. I'ts truly a mish mash of arbos...

As I said some things will never change..

• Tazkia will probably always with us 'lil' people, escaping to Halqa every so often
• Safiyyah will always turn up with the serious look on her face and the infamous waterbottle (cos 'she dont drink fizzys' u no)
• Tasy will more often than not turn up late and adds her two cents (doesnt make much sense) after everything the speakers
• AQ will always be the only guy who 'contributes' to the session
• The girls will always outnumber the guys ( most of them look abit terrified and nerdy, regulars excluded)

I'll continue this list some other time... Im bored...;( At least I did halfa post

For Tazzle WAzzle

A special dedication, in memory of my partner in crime who was lost on February 13th 2007 to the Engineering faculty of UKZN. A great loss to woman and mankind.

Hey my pal Tazkee

who makes oh so much masti,

You make me sad, exchanging th weird

To become a silly old fullgrown nerd,

Don leme down and bcum a physics geek

We have lotsa projects to complete,

Think about all the times we've gne mads

Laughed like nuts and scared the lads,

Started the wave and got engaged

Run round the stadium(bazaar) and messes made,

Had sehri and felt so sick

Played 30secs and watched the clock tick,

On the waterslides we've made trains

Nobody questions that we're insane!

Hysteria,laughter,madness and food(BP)

To become normal again you'll make me brood

Not to mention put yourself in a very foul mood!!

TO ALL those who read my blog

LEAVE a comment, peepz... or don't bother reading at all... I feel like I'm talking2meself;(

Random thoughts on.... Today

Feeling sick today.. slight cold, all the yucky green boggies coming out my nose and got that choked feeling because the thick yellow mucus ihas coated the insides of my throat..eeeeee...I love graphic detail that makes everyone go YUUUUCK! I have this fetish for any disgusting,perverted,vulgar sick jokes/stories etc, am totally convinced I was meant to be a boy;)

Anyway back to blogging about today -i wasoooo excited about this weekend coS its ABSOLUTELY COMMITMENT free- no school events,no parties,no coffee dates, com serv projects,workshops,weddings,braais, no obligations- weekends like this hardly ever come around, intended to spend it sleeping and slouched out in front of the tv.Sadly I'm so immune to sleep deprivation, I can't sleep more than 5 solid hours and tv captures by attention for a total of like 5minutes, keep looking at the clock thinking i should be somewhere....

Families gone out t the movies (my rents really do go out alot for old ppl), friends and other mad associates are god-no's where and I'm spendin my long anticiapated 'me time' - sniffling and simultaneously popping a sudafed,listening to my ipod and BLOGGING! IM BORED!

Today I did nothing except plan my vendetta against Devlin the Com Serv Executive... Saffiyah and I have had it up to here with the dude.. he always promises to email us nececarry documents and then fails to come through, he's the most ineffient,incompentent lil loser and when I get my hands on him on monday at board meeting I'm gonna fry his ass!!!!

I've come up with 2 creative solutions to 'sawt' him out

1) Phone him and threaten to blow him up with a hand grenade, salvage his bodily remains, tear it in to smaller bits, shove him in the blender I keep for special occasions (like this) and blend him up with dead roaches and lizards and milk (the cherry on the top, mmmm love milk) and..... (havent exactly figured out what I'm gonna do with the executive milkshake but you get the pic)

2)Phone him and inform him that I belong to an influenticial mafia-like family and if he doesnt get his act together, I'll send someone to his house to kill his pet puppy and bust him up.

I tried both of these today but as the prick-alitus's phone was turned off, I didnt get very far with my threats..

just wait till monday.....

Random thoughts on..... CriCkeet

Not really in the mood2be a blogger but tazz is nagging so here goes...

Cricket on Wed.... My opinion: another oppurtunity for the bored 'Moslem' Durbanites to strut their stuff, in betweeny teeny boppers desperately trying to 'acquire' a 'social life', society dolls plastered with makeup and rather inappropriate clothing (i mean-heels to the cric??) making tawaaf of our drabbish excuse for a cricket stadium and over-enthusiastic guys attempting to impress the chicks... sigh... all this amongst the pissed charo uncles who find it amusing to send beer flying in all directions... then why the hell do I bother going, I ask myself?? I suppose despite all these lil turn off factors I always end up having a Greeeat time. I'm one of those absolutely mad,patriotic South Africans... im all for paint, screaming like a possessed lunatic and initiating the mexican wave( see photos above) (particularly amusing pic is the chips which were stored at top of the tipsy umbrella... hmmm ONLY US!!)lolol

Sadly I'd have to say the highlight was when the electricity went off (was witha arbest peepz but oh well)!!!!! Tas and I made no secret of the fact that it was the perfect jam time (by screaming about it not jamming;p) and tried to create a riot by standing on chairs in South like the true monkeys we are and making as much noise as possible...I've always, always wanted to strip and run on the field in my bday suit and danmn! I missed by opp
anyway SA's pathetic performance, I have no words people!! Just to let u no Sauds and R- it took me half and hour t remove the paint from my arms and I still have blodgies!!)

Oh oh oh, almost 4got... had to change into school uniform to go to council midway through cric and got more weird looks and verbal abuse then when I wore pjs,slippers and carried teddy to pav AND graves... go figure!!

Random thoughts on..... Wedding Fever

( The chinese flowergirls that went with the walima theme.. the outfits came out pretty cuyoot)

Hmmm.... a lil overdaramatized (some of the stuff was from the wedding the week before)Written in a fit of exasperation to convey my mAD families madness...

It was when I began to contemplate the difference between complex and complicated that I knew the situation was getting out of hand. It was the middle of the night and I awoke with sweaty palms and a frozen shoulder. It took me a little while to make sense of things as I lay there exhausted after 3 sleepless nights. I smiled cynically when I realised that the sweaty palms were not because of fear but because my hands were encased in a thin film of plastic to protect my hands that were covered in intricately painted henna. Another uncomfortable Indian wedding tradition.

An Indian wedding is complex because it deals with the volatility and unpredictability of human interaction – this intense complex, spicy web of cousins, chachas, chachis, nanis, dadis the connections from overseas and the Aunt of my second cousin twice removed who I suspect was just a fraud who was taking advantage of the wedding to get free boarding and lodging. I even went as far as testing her knowledge of the family tree in order to unmask her charade. She passed with flying colours but I still had my doubts. She was a slim Aunty that one.

It all started when dear cousin Haroon announced his intention to marrying Shaeeda. First began the charade of the elders proposing and then waiting expectantly for an answer. We all knew that this was all cut and dried and just a protocol to show the community that tradition was being followed. The wedding couple had already decided and there was no changing that. Then began the endless phone calls between his mother and her mother as to the date of the wedding. Christmas weekend was out as there were no hired help to be had. The first week of January was out because it was the school rush and it did not suit the grooms family as this would affect the retail sales of stationery and school uniforms from the family retail stores. The second week of January was not suitable for the brides family as Foi from L.A had another wedding to attend to and could not make it. Things were really getting desperate and I being impatient and seeing chances of my wearing a beautiful outfit going through the window suggested to a great consternation and a fainting fit from the grooms mother that Foi should be forgotten, and that the store should be closed for one day. Finally the 3rd week in January was settled on after cries from mothers that this was the opening week of school and the wedding would disrupt there school going kids. I scoffed at this silly objection and live to regret this when 2 days into the school term my brother through up in front of the Westville boys high school gates, I lost an entire school day shivering under blankets with a high fever an a headache that lasted for three days. It was all those late nights leading up to the wedding. Another lesson was learnt- Never underestimate the wisdom of an Indian mother and no one is superhero. The laws of the universe still hold wedding or no wedding and anything less than a good seven hour sleep can lead to absolute ruin.

How we got through the wedding in one piece with sanity and family name intact is still a source of great wonderment to me. I almost lost my faith in my fellow human beings as we tallied the endless broken promises and let downs. The wedding planner in her great wisdom and grossly overestimating her capacity for work and her talent booked two weddings back to back one on a Sunday and another on Monday. While checking in on the monday wedding, her car keys were waylaid by the family who insisted she finish of the hall decorations and held her captive. Our hall was half done and a riot almost ensued when the news came through. The young blood wanted to rush of to the opposing wedding to deal with this atrocity in a high handed manner and were duly restrained by shrieking mothers who feared that this would lead to a mafia style fracas that would leave there sons disabled for the rest of there lives. Finally Uncle Mohammed the towns tycoon had to intervene with the offending family who released the now very harried and distraught wedding planner. Then began the all night vigil by all members of the family to ready the hall and to save the family name from a disgrace that we would never recover from.

The list of misfortunes were endless. There was Uncle Hassan who embarrassed the entire family by announcing that he was the Ghar Jammay ( lived with his in laws), the groom pitched up ½ an hour late to the reception and our entire family missed receiving the brides family at our reception as everyone was running late due to the previous nights sleepless vigil and the extensive time spent on hair and makeup.

I still wakeup with a cold sweat at night with horrifying dreams of all that had occurred and I have come to the firm conclusion that the intricacies of an Indian wedding far surpass even the construction of the most complicated Jet Plane. I look back on all the hysterics, tears, tantrums and drama wasted on one wedding and all I can do is shake my head and marvel. It is quite astonishing to note that I have actually lived to tell the tale.The defining point for me was on the supper table, post-wedding when my dad proclaimed that he would actually pay me double what my wedding would cost if I had no wedding at all!

An optimist would say that our wedding mayhem and hysteria almost always results in the most entertaining,colourful weddings, a pessimist would wonder why Indians even bother to get married. I say, I intend on eloping… or my all-time favourite JUST NOT GETTING MARRIED!!

Random thoughts on..... Embarassment

At a very recent workshop (mmm,like 2day) we were made to divulge our 'most embarassing moment'. I hate these 'get2no u' exercises, besides being absolutely pointless they always place me in a painful spot, I've decided my least favourite question is 'Tell us 1 interesting thing about yourself?' I've even begun to refuse answering it... by the time the facilitator gets around the circle you've missed out on what everyone else has said because you're too preoccupied trying to conjure up some lil interestiong but not too weird fact about yourself.Anyway.. the embarassing moment thing wasn't too bad and plunged me into sobering thoughts about 'embarrasment' and then i realised if 'embarassment' is feeling 'awkward,shy or uncomfortable in a social situation' it happens often!!!I mean an embarrasing moment isnt only the overwhelmingly 'hide my head in shame' bcos sure I've had those... getting a concusssion from a soccer ball that scarred my physci so much that I now run in the opposite direction when I see anything round coming toward my head, running someone into a wall once because I thought they were someone else(pls dont ask), being thrown into a relatively public-ishy pool with a short skirt and red underwear and na na na the list continues.... but 'embarrasing' happens everyday of my life. One would almost be forced to think that I constantly place myself in those situations and question my sanity... alas.. I can't eat ANYTHING without making a beeeg mess, I have the most 'unique', potty, hideous laughter and after 12 syndrome!! and I always, always do the maddest, dumbest thing... (T,S,S- You'll know what I;m talking about) but u no what the funny thing iss..... I don't giva flying fart:)... so I've come to the fabbest conclusion... embarrasment kinda rocks(in aweirdy twisty kind way)

Why the blog....

Hmm so the obvious question.. why the hell did I start a blog??? hmmm... well besides Taz pleading me to join her in her conquest to be the maddest peepz in durbz (although she assures me that "lotsa" ppl have blogs...hahaha whatttttever) I figured it would be quite cool to have my lil space and to shove my most random thoughts somewhere... so here goes... the beggining of the 'BLOG'... God help...

Oh and the name.. Bazzle the turnip.. I was christened by someone I call Enrii the Radish... uhh don't bother asking, one of the nurses at Westville Hospital dropd me when I was born